This is a blog about how I blame myself. I’m not sure why I do this, except that I know it is easier to forgive myself sometimes than it is to forgive the person who transgressed against me. And I’m not really one to get into the blame game. But in all actuality, I should be trying to forgive the other person, and not even blame myself.
Now you may be wondering why I’m saying this now. Well, I have basically decided that I was hoodwinked by Alex. I don’t want to go into all of that, but I do blame myself for believing what he said. I blame myself for thinking that we could be friends. I blame myself for not going much slower. I allowed myself to be kind of swept off my feet and I’m realizing that I really don’t want to do that.
I don’t want to be swept off my feet because I’m not very good at recognizing when the person is being truthful and when he’s just trying to win me.Maybe truthful is not the right word, but at 2:49 AM I can’t think of the word I want to use!Suffice to say, I don’t think you really can fall in love with someone that you don’t know and it takes time to get to really know someone and to trust them. Especially for someone who has a few trust issues. I will say this though. This is the first time in nearly 14 years or more that I have felt this way about a man and as I traverse this crazy path to romance, I will be a little bit more careful the next time. And after all, you can’t change the past. All you can do is learn from it, and I plan to.
1/28/24 About to Self Publish
I’m about to self publish my blogs as soon as I figure out how to do it!I compiled them into a 253 page book, and I was completely astounded. I couldn’t believe how many I had written, and I couldn’t believe how far I had come. I hope if you read all 530 some blogs of mine, you realize that I have come a far way too. This truly is a crazy occupation and I am a crazy fool for having undertook it, but I wouldn’t change 90% of it! Stay tuned for more details, and if you know anything about self publishing, please get in touch with me.