I often write about what I’m grateful for and I keep it in my phone so that I can refer back to it when I need to see it. As I turn another year older today, I am very cognizant of my gratitude for having lived another year. Life is so precarious and unpredictable. My mother is 93 this year so I figure I will at least live till 90. But then I see and hear about people dying all the time that shouldn’t be dying at their age. And then I know that I should be grateful for having lived to this age.
I am not alone on my birthday, but I’m not with the person I want to be with. I don’t even know who he is. And I’m very aware of my current state of being and the loneliness attached to it. So when I lament about my age and my loneliness, I have to remember that I chose the occupation I have, and this is probably a big part of my loneliness. That and the fact that online dating is really for the birds. I realize in this past year that I am not going to meet someone through the work that I do.
I am very grateful for the work that I do. And for the most part, I really do enjoy it. Probably as much as anybody with a regular job! So if I have to be alone, so be it, because I’m not giving up my current position. I may be lonely, but I definitely enjoy my lifestyle and the control that I have over my living situation. I have to admit that there are some good things about being alone.
I look at today as just being another day in my life. Gonna try to make it fun and enjoyable. I have two dates set up, one with a an old regular and one with a very good friend. We’re putting together my birthday present, which is an end table for my bedroom, and that will be nice to have.
I hope everyone reading this has a great day today and enjoy the hot weather. I’m looking so forward to getting in the pool!Too bad I can’t go naked, but I don’t think the kids would appreciate that!
Many happy returns !!
Patty
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