That doesn’t mean it’s bad. It just means we’re both nervous.

I’ve always said that if you find someone you like, stick with them. Seeing a new escort can be nerve-racking. You’re nervous because you don’t know what to expect. I’m nervous because I don’t know you yet, either. I don’t know your intentions. I don’t know if you’re kind, respectful, or someone I’ll enjoy spending time with. We are both taking a leap of faith.

When men are nervous, certain things don’t always work as well as they normally do. I’ll let you figure out what I mean by that.

What I notice, though, is that most men start to relax pretty quickly. As they become more comfortable, they stop worrying and start focusing on enjoying the moment.

The men who seem the least nervous are often the ones who have read my blogs. In some ways, they know me better than I know them. They’ve spent time getting a feel for my personality, my sense of humor, and how I think. That familiarity seems to make a big difference.

Another thing that happens when two people are nervous is that they tend to talk more. That’s certainly true of me. The first time I see you, I’ll probably talk more than I will the second, third, or fourth time.

The truth is that things get better over time. We become more comfortable with each other. We know what to expect. We relax. And when that happens, we’re both able to enjoy our time together a lot more.

So if the first The First Time Is the Worst Time

The title says it all: the first time we see each other is probably going to be the worst time between us.

That doesn’t mean it’s bad. It just means we’re both nervous.

I’ve always said that if you find someone you like, stick with them. Seeing a new escort can be nerve-racking. You’re nervous because you don’t know what to expect. I’m nervous because I don’t know you yet, either. I don’t know your intentions. I don’t know if you’re kind, respectful, or someone I’ll enjoy spending time with. We are both taking a leap of faith.

When men are nervous, certain things don’t always work as well as they normally do. I’ll let you figure out what I mean by that.

What I notice, though, is that most men start to relax pretty quickly. As they become more comfortable, they stop worrying and start focusing on enjoying the moment.

The men who seem the least nervous are often the ones who have read my blogs. In some ways, they know me better than I know them. They’ve spent time getting a feel for my personality, my sense of humor, and how I think. That familiarity seems to make a big difference.

Another thing that happens when two people are nervous is that they tend to talk more. That’s certainly true of me. The first time I see you, I’ll probably talk more than I will the second, third, or fourth time.

The truth is that things get better over time. We become more comfortable with each other. We know what to expect. We relax. And when that happens, we’re both able to enjoy our time together a lot more.

So if the first visit feels a little awkward or a little nervous, don’t worry. That’s perfectly normal. The first time is usually the worst time. After that, it tends to get better and better. visit feels a little awkward or a little nervous, don’t worry. That’s perfectly normal. The first time is usually the worst time. After that, it tends to get better and better.

And what better way to get those needs taken care of than by seeing an escort who is mature, patient, fun, and silly all at the same time? Much better than having an affair. No complicated emotions involved except maybe friendship. No contacting you after you leave because why would I? Just something to look forward to. Someone to look forward to.

The thing about the title is that if you look at the five love languages, the one that always seems to stand out for men is physical touch. And if you’re not getting that somewhere else, eventually you’re going to need to find it somewhere.

For some men, that’s simply massage and a rub and tug. And that’s perfectly fine too. The massage is usually very good, the release is nice, and you don’t have to do it yourself. Not quite the same as seeing an escort, but definitely a runner-up.

But seeing the same person repeatedly to get your needs met actually shows a certain level of maturity in my opinion. Which is why I’ve always thought of hobbyists as somewhat immature. It’s OK to form an attachment to someone who is providing you with a service, much in the same way you might with a massage therapist or a hairstylist. They’re giving you something valuable, and over time you naturally get to know them through that.

I suppose you can try to repress or ignore your needs, but I think that only works for so long. Human beings need touch, connection, affection, and release. There are only so many times you can take care of all of that by yourself before it starts feeling lonely.

5/21/26 Update on Me

You might’ve noticed that I haven’t written many blogs lately. That’s probably because I’m doing so well and staying so busy that I’m not thinking about writing blogs. Mah-Jongg Jewelry by Patty has really taken off. In fact, escorting is becoming my side hustle now. It still pays the bills, but MJP has been growing month over month.

Even during a time when people supposedly aren’t spending money on luxury items, they’re still buying my bracelets. And more and more boutiques are starting to buy from me too. A lot of my time these days is spent working on MJP.

Gary and I are doing great. We’re coming up on a year and a half together, and we’re going to Grafton this weekend to celebrate my recent 65th birthday. Grafton is very cute and touristy, and we love shopping and wandering through different boutiques. We’ll go out for a nice dinner too. He’s very good to me, and we’ve even started talking about when I might retire and move in with him.

And speaking of retirement, if MJP continues doing as well as it has been, I may retire from escorting in two years when I turn 67. I hope and pray things continue the way they have been because honestly, I’m very happy right now.

Now that I’ve lived in St. Louis for a full year, I can honestly say I feel fully acclimated to life here. I seem to drive a lot more now, mostly because I usually do the driving when Gary and I go out together. But I absolutely love having an electric car and spending about $10 a week on electricity.

I also love being closer to my sisters. My older sister and I are actually getting along much better these days, and she’s going to help me take my jewelry around to boutiques.

I’ve also reconnected with an old friend named Ronnie. Thirty years ago we were best friends, and I really tried my darndest to get back into her good graces. I think I finally have. I probably see her twice a month now.

I’m also thinking about joining the Y now that I have Silver Sneakers and really have no excuse not to since it’s free. I’d love to get back into the water and do some aqua exercise in the mornings. You know me — not that much into exercising unless it’s fun.

Well, I guess that’s it for now. I’m at a really good place in my life. I really should write a book about starting over at 65. exercise in the morning. We’ll see. You know me. Not that much into exercising unless it’s fun.

Well, I guess that’s it for now. I’m at a really good place in my life. I really should write a book about starting over at 65.

Sometimes, with certain clients, it feels like I’m just a hole. And I have to tell you—I hate that feeling.

I understand that there will always be a percentage of men who approach seeing an escort as nothing more than getting off. In their minds, it’s purely transactional. Honestly, if that’s all they want, they could use a glory hole and accomplish the same thing. But that feels…empty. Detached. And yes, a little gross.

What I don’t understand is choosing to be with a real woman—someone with a face, a personality, a presence—and still treating her like she’s invisible.

Now, to be fair, I don’t see many men like this. My ads are very clear: I’m offering connection, conversation, and chemistry along with the physical experience. Because without that context, sex becomes mechanical. Get in, get off, get out. Done.

That doesn’t interest me.

To me, when a man sees you as “just a hole,” he’s not seeing you as a person at all. He’s seeing a role. A label. Something he can use and walk away from without a second thought. Maybe I’m wrong, but I tend to think of these men as emotionally shallow—or at the very least, disconnected from intimacy. Some may even be struggling with compulsive behavior, where connection isn’t the goal at all.

The reality is, because of what I do, I know I’ll be seen in different ways by different men. For some, I’ll never be more than that. But interestingly, those are rarely the men I see again—and not because I block them.

They just move on. And honestly, so do I.

4/3/26  Hobbyists 

I had to write this after the last blog, because there’s an obvious overlap.

Hobbyists.

For those who don’t know, hobbyists are men who make a “hobby” out of seeing different escorts. They’re not looking for consistency or connection—they’re chasing variety. The next new experience. The next “flavor of the month.”

And yes, I’ve been that flavor.

Will I see a hobbyist twice? Almost never. In over ten years, I honestly can’t remember a single one who came back.

Do I enjoy seeing them? It depends. Some are perfectly nice. Some are not. But overall, it’s not my favorite experience. There’s something inherently unsatisfying about spending time with someone when you both know it’s a one-time encounter—especially when connection is important to me.

What I struggle with most is the mindset behind it.

To me, being a hobbyist feels a lot like chasing something you can’t quite catch. Always looking for better, newer, different. And I can’t help but wonder—what are they really searching for?

I would genuinely love to hear from men who identify this way. What is it about constant variety that appeals to you? What does it give you that one consistent connection doesn’t?

And yes, I’ve wondered if there’s a link to addiction. Not in a judgmental way—just observational. Because that constant need for something new can feel less like enjoyment and more like compulsion.

Do I have something against addiction? No. Not at all. Addiction is real, and it’s hard. I’ve seen it in many forms, and I have compassion for it.

I don’t screen clients based on whether I think they might be struggling with something like that. Truthfully, you often don’t know. And as long as someone respects me and my space, I’ll see them.

But there is a part of me that feels a quiet sadness for anyone who can’t slow down long enough to actually connect.

Because in the end, that’s the part that matters most—to me, anyway.

She knows you still have needs. She’s not naive. She may not know how those needs are being met—or maybe she tells herself you’re just taking care of things on your own—but she knows they’re still there.

And I have to believe that for many of these women, especially those who have completely and drastically shut down that part of their lives after menopause, there is a quiet kind of pain that comes with it.

Because on some level, they know they’ve lost something.

Not just the act itself—but the ability, the desire, the connection… the role they once played in your life in that way.

And that loss doesn’t just belong to you.

It belongs to them too.

I don’t usually respond to forum posts, but since my name has come up I thought I would say a few words directly.

First, thank you to those who have seen me and shared their experiences. Anyone who has met me knows that what you see is exactly what you get. I show up on time, I look like my photos, and I do my best to make the time we spend together enjoyable.

A couple of comments mentioned that I “talk a lot” or ask personal questions. That’s true—I’m naturally curious and conversational. Many of the men who see me appreciate that because it creates a relaxed and genuine atmosphere rather than something that feels cold or mechanical. Of course, everyone has different preferences, and that’s perfectly fine.

I also noticed some discussion about certain activities that I do not offer. I’ve always been very clear about my boundaries and about maintaining my health and safety. Those boundaries are not negotiable.

If someone is only looking for a body, there are plenty of options for that. What I offer is a genuine experience with a real person, clear boundaries, and mutual respect.

As for remarks about my age or appearance, I’m very comfortable with who I am. I’m proud of the life experience and confidence I bring to the table. Many wonderful men appreciate a confident, mature woman, and those are the people I most enjoy spending time with.

At the end of the day, the best way to know someone is to meet them yourself rather than relying on second-hand opinions on the internet.

Wishing everyone well,
Patty

I don’t usually blog about my encounters. Mostly because there isn’t that much to say beyond, “It was nice.” But today? That would not be true.

I met with an Aussie man who made me giggle with delight and scream with fear — the good kind. You see, he had me in every position imaginable, and at one point I swear he twirled me in the air. It was pure fun. Pure passion. And I don’t think I’ve ever felt that level of intensity in a session before.

We started the way I often do — me on top. Easy enough. But then he had what I can only describe as a very creative idea. He lifted us into a kind of lotus position — me sitting on him while he sat upright — and before I knew it, he had picked me up and twirled me toward the side of the bed with my bottom hanging off the edge. By this point I was giggling uncontrollably.

Then he lifted me again — and this is where I think he twirled me (I honestly can’t be sure; it was all happening so fast) — and tossed me back onto the bed like he had choreographed the whole thing. I mean, this man was masterful. It felt planned. Practiced. Or maybe just instinctive. Hmmm.

We tried a few more positions — some I had never done before. One I’m not sure I need to repeat. But overall? It was exhilarating.

And here’s the thing: he made me feel light as a feather. And from a woman’s vantage point, there is absolutely nothing wrong with feeling like a feather.

It’s too bad he lives in Canada and I’ll likely never see him again. But I won’t forget him. No way. No how.

And I can almost hear her saying:

Sakes alive I’m 95

Now I would rather be where you’re at

But that is neither here nor that

I tell you what it’s not so bad

To be with Arthur, Jim and Dad

And don’t you worry your sweet little hearts

Cause even in heaven, there’s nothing worse than my farts

Fooey nuts is all I can say

And I’ll be here on your judgement day!

That was her.

A little dramatic. A little irreverent. Completely unwilling to let anything get too sentimental without poking it with a stick.

She’d remind us she’d rather still be here — and in the same breath reassure us she’s fine where she is. She’d name the men she loved. She’d make heaven sound like a reunion instead of a mystery.

And then she’d ruin the holiness with a fart joke.

Because even in heaven, you’re still you.

The line that stays with me is this:

And I’ll be here on your judgement day.

Still watching. Still mothering. Still loving.

If she were 95, she’d be laughing while we cried.

And somehow, that makes me feel better.

I find a client who will later become my friend.

It always starts innocently enough. A simple half-hour appointment. Nothing dramatic. Nothing overly charged. Just two people meeting, spending time together. But sometimes, even in that short window, you can tell there’s something there. A comfort. A curiosity. A sense of ease.

The time is well spent — for both of us.

So I see him again.

Maybe once a month for three months. By then, I start to think of him as a regular. After six months, we truly know each other. We remember details. We follow up on conversations. We know what’s happening in each other’s lives.

And after nine months?

We’re friends. Plain and simple.

I care about what happens to him. He cares about what happens to me. When we see each other, we check in. Not just physically, but emotionally. We celebrate wins. We talk through struggles. There’s a real connection there.

This is part of what makes me special as a provider.

I don’t doubt that there are other women who work the same way I do — and are just as successful, maybe even more so. But I will never give up my quest to have a whole bevy of good friends and lovers. That’s what fulfills me. That’s what makes this meaningful.

Once we cross that line from client to friend, the only direction is either up or out.

By up, I mean it deepens. It gets richer. The trust grows. The vulnerability grows. The exploration grows. The friendship strengthens. We raise each other’s sexual consciousness because we feel safe enough to do so.

By out, I don’t mean something bad.

Sometimes it gets so good that it naturally ends. Life changes. Circumstances shift. People move. Relationships evolve. The connection has served its purpose beautifully — and it’s complete.

But I will never stop striving for that connection that turns into friendship.

Because only when there is real trust, real care, and real openness can you truly explore different avenues together. Only then can you push boundaries thoughtfully. Only then can you raise each other’s awareness — sexually, emotionally, spiritually.

That’s what I’m after.

Not just time.

Connection.

And when I find it, I treasure it.

Oh my word, what a useless site this is.

Men get on there and post reports about escorts. Now, I suppose that could be a good thing — especially if there are escorts out there robbing people or doing worse. But what I see most often is men randomly choosing an escort to bash.

I’ve had the lovely opportunity to be the main topic of discussion on there a couple of times, and it isn’t pretty. Besides being made fun of for losing 110 pounds and having saggy skin, I’ve been called plenty of names. I won’t repeat them here — you can probably guess.

That site is also where I first heard that I “talk too much.” And as much as I know I shouldn’t, I still take those comments to heart.

What’s interesting is that it’s usually the same few people posting over and over again. I found the same thing on ECCIE. I was on there for maybe six months before deciding it was totally male-chauvinistic. Escorts couldn’t even respond to the reviews left about them, and the reviews weren’t vetted. I thought very little of that site.

I know a lot of people use these forums, but I personally ban them. I’m not sure there’s any review site I would truly trust. It’s just too easy for someone to claim they met you when they didn’t. It can hurt a woman’s reputation and doesn’t really tell the full story anyway.

1/26/26 – Mah-Jongg Jewelry by Patty

I recently decided to start a new business, and if you’re interested in what I’m doing on the side, you can check out my website at mahjonggjewelry.com.

It’s pretty cool stuff — and mah-jongg is very hot right now.

I’m selling on Amazon, and when the weather gets better, I’ll be going around to boutiques and looking for a manufacturers’ rep. I also have an assistant helping me make some of the jewelry, drill tiles, and handle a bit of the administrative work.

I’m excited to see ywhere this goes. I love a hobby that lets me be creative and make money at the same time.